So this is my first Fanfic! Sorry if it sucks... If there is any spelling mistakes or grammar mistakes please leave it be! I know that there may be some but I have always been bad with grammar and spelling! So here it is!!! The fanfic that probably sucks!!! Part 1
I do not own your or Hetalia! The story is the only thing that belongs to me!
You woke up to your loud and obnoxious alarm clock and glared at it for a minute. 'Why did the weekend have to go by so fast!' You just wanted to throw your alarm clock at a wall and go back to sleep. You were about to do just that when your mom walked in your room.
"_____, I know you don't want to get up but you have to. You need to stop staying up so late! Now come on get out of bed!" Your mom said as she walked over to you. "I made your favorite! [insert favorite breakfast here]!" Then she left.
'Only if she knew how much of a hellhole school was...' You thought as you dragged yourself out of bed. The only reason you stayed up so late was because of crying. It is of the only things you think you can do about the hell-hole is cry your self sleep every night after you get home. That and cut You have never been popular. You were always an outcast that just didn't belong. You used to ignore what people said and stood up for yourself, but after awhile you started to believe everything they said.
You grabbed the towel and headed to the bathroom to get a quick shower and wake yourself up. After that you looked at yourself in the mirror and stared at all the scars going up your arms and legs. They were even starting to form on your stomach. You swept your hand along your scars and cuts as you stared. "If only you knew..." That was all you mumbled to yourself before you got dressed.
~~~~~ Le Time Skip ~~~~~
You where outside the entrance of school and just stood there staring. 'Maybe I should skip.' You were about to turn around and walk away until you heard a loud obnoxious voice. "HAHAHAHA! Dude, you should of seen her face!"
It was Alfred.
Without thinking you quickly opened the school doors and ran to the bathroom. "So much for skipping..." You mumbled to yourself once you were safe inside the girls bathroom. You decided to wait until the hallways cleared up before getting your stuff from your locker for class.
You waited about ten minutes for the hallways to be completely empty. You were going to be late to class, but at least you could avoid anything from Alfred. For now.
As you were walking down the hall to get to class you heard your name. Although it was said rather quiet. You turned around to see your only and best friend Matthew Williams. "_____!" He said in a excited, yet quiet voice. He ran over to hug you.
"Hey, Mattie!" You said to him while hugging him back.
"I was worried. I didn't see you this morning so I though something had happened and-"
"Mattie, don't worry. I'm A-Okay!" You quickly reassured him by giving him a thumbs up. After that you and Mattie walked off to class and joked around a bit. 'Maybe this won't be such a bad day.' You though and smiled to yourself.
~~~~~ Le Time Skip... AGAIN! ~~~~~
'Well so much for a good day!" Alfred and his some of his friends had ganged up on you, and now you were on the floor trying to shrink away. It wasn't working. "HAHAHAHA! Oh looks what's this!" Alfred said when he saw your journal. That was the journal you wrote all of your private stuff in. It had all your secrets in it. "Looks pretty important to the waste of air!" He called you several things like loser, emo, nerd, a mistake at life, worthless, and a lot of other things.
'No! Please god give me just a little bit of luck!" You silently prayed that over and over again. No one knew half the stuff written in there. Not even Mattie. "And just what is going on here!" You were happy. It was a teacher!
"Scram!" One of the guys from the group yelled. They all quickly ran away. That didn't stop Alfred from kicking you before he ran away. All you heard was laughter before you blacked out from all the pain.
You woke up in the Nurses office and saw Mattie standing ext to the bed you were in. "_____!" He yelled then hugged you, but not to hard because he knew it would hurt you. "Thank god your all right!"
After the hug he looked at you nervously. He wanted to ask you something but was afraid to. "Mattie? Is there something you wanna ask me?" You looked at him with concern.
~~~~~ Matthews POV ~~~~~
"Uh... well..." I looked around the room because I didn't know how to tell her that I saw her cuts! I noticed them while helping a teacher carry her here. I just happened to walk by when I saw her passed out!
"Mattie?" Now she is looking at me with concern. 'She shouldn't be the one concerned! She did just wake up after passing out from pain!'
"Umm... Well you see..." I pointed at her arms. "I know about... your... cuts..."
~~~~~ Your POV ~~~~~
"I know about... Your... cuts...." He said that very quietly but you heard him clearly. You just stared at your arms trying to hold back the tears. 'He knows! Why..." You couldn't hold back your tears. You couldn't believe your best friend had found out about your self harming. You wanted to disappear. 'He is going to leave! I just know it-' Your thought where interrupted were interrupted by Mattie hugging you. "It will be alright. I will always stay by your side, _____." You hugged him back while crying into his shoulder.
~~~~~ Le Time Skip ~~~~~
You sat on your bed and wrote about your day in your journal. 'Today was horrible. When isn't it? Today I got beat up by Alfred and some of his stupid friends. It was so bad that I was knocked out cold for an hour! Worst part of the day was when Mattie found out about my cuts. I somehow got him to keep his mouth shut so that's good. I don't get how Alfred can go around calling himself a "hero" when all he does every day is put me down! Last time I checked heroes don't put other people down. At. All.' You wrote down all your thoughts in the journal. Somehow it lifted some of the weight off your shoulders.
After you wrote down all of your thoughts you put your journal into a little opening in your closet. The small opening, that could only hold a few books, was found when you were ten. You were looking for your other shoe and saw something you could pull open. You kept it a secret from your mother just in case you needed to hide something, like a journal about your life.
You laid back down and cried. You cried for an hour and then a song that described your life came on. If You Knew by Joel Faviere. As you listened to those lyrics tears fell from your eyes.
They think you're crazy.
They think you're mad.
They call you stupid, worthless, tell you you're not worth it.
You started to fall asleep as the song continued.
Now you're walkin' back, to a place you call home,
but you feel so alone.
The same hurtful hits, it's your darker place.
In your virgin ears, the remarks they make.
And if they, if they really knew all of those things;
that you do in your room, to hide the pain.
I bet their minds would change.
I'll bet their minds would change.
They'd change, If they knew the pain.
'Cause I believe in these scars.
'Cause I believe...
'If they knew... the pain...' That was your last thought as you let sleep engulf you.
~~~~~ Le horrible time for Time Skip ~~~~~
You walked down the halls trying to get to class without any trouble but no because luck isn't on your side. "Hey fatass!" You heard that loud annoying obnoxious voice yell. You were about to turn around but instead you got pushed into the lockers in front of you. "I am just gonna say this now! You tell anyone about anything I do to you and you will pay! I will make your life hell!" Then he kicked you in the back since you were facing the lockers and walked away. 'Right because my life isn't already a living hell...'
You got up and started to walk to class. You turned the corner and fully regretted it. It was Prussia. That guy wasn't as bad as Alfred but he still bullied you. "Kesesese~! What do we have here?" He smirked as he walked up to you.
He was in your face yelling about how worthless you were. "No body likes you! Your not only a waste of precious air, your a fucking ugly fatass with no friends! Keseseses!"
You hated the 'Prussian's' stupid laugh. It was annoying. Especially when he was bullying you. Just when you thought your day couldn't get any worse the stupid American came out of the bathroom.
"Hey, Al! Look what I got!" Alfred looked up and smirked at the 'Prussian' then walked over to where you were being held up against a wall. 'Oh just wonderful...' At that thought you where dropped on the ground to get beaten up some more.
After getting punched and kicked several times they both walked away laughing as you laid there in pain. You wanted to die. You were sick of being pushed around by every one. You dragged yourself to the girls bathroom, went in a stall, and started to bawl. You searched every where through your bag until you found what you where looking for. Your pocket knife. 'Well dad... I hope your happy... Your only belonging left behind is being used for something...' With that said you started making deep cuts up and down your arms.